Promiscuity and Well-Being (Part 1)

There is the popular belief that a man’s days are numbered. Should death come, nothing can be done about it. So, as humans, do we think we could do ‘a thing’ to lengthen or shorten our days?

“My younger look is thanks to celibacy … I lead a simple and disciplined life … Discipline is the most important thing in life. One can conquer anything with discipline in food habits, exercise and sexual desires”

In October 2019, the world awoke to the news of the oldest man alive, Mr Sivananda, a 123 years old Indian man who looked decades younger than his age.  His story became an internet sensation on social networking sites.  This story got me thinking and asking the question: “Is there a relationship between living a promiscuous life and a healthy/long life“?

Not sure how best to address this issue, I decided to go on a fact-finding journey during which I had discussions with male and female from varying fields of life – Academics, Finance, Music, Student, Law, Human Resource Experts, Tech Geeks, Geo-Scientist, Journalist, Freethinker and a Pastor.

Background to Discussion

Very importantly, the context within which this issue is being discussed matters. It is simply context-based. Stories from our life’s journey, experiences and how we interpret situations or what has happened to us could also be the determining factors. Bear in mind that what culture was years’ back, what culture is now and what culture may mean in the future is quite different. Why? Culture is moving unpredictably. Therefore, views held on this topic of discussion would vary from culture to culture and from clime-to-clime.

The Reality

Living in a liberal world makes you think. You wonder at a lot of things. From the religious point of view, it is a clear case of “No” while in the social sciences; it is open to a lot of debate. On the other hand, the health sciences would likely come from the viewpoint of “exercising caution” considering the dangers while Social Psychology would probably explain that one stands to gain a lot as you experience the feeling and sense of conquering, winning the chase and building your confidence through it all.

A lot of marriages have become ‘living contractual prisons’. So, tell me, how will people who have not had healthy engagements with themselves, have healthy engagement in marriage? That said, what is promiscuity? Promiscuity could entail actively sleeping about, having active multiple partners or simply just exploring your freedom in a bid to discover yourself. According to human biology, such feelings are expected and considered positive – a sign of healthy sexuality and sexual life. Whereas, religion would say it is bad. How then, do we manage this? Learning to accommodate all persons without the fear of sounding or been seen as judgemental.

Early Training

The early training of teenagers is a welcome idea. Why? The feelings are not bad in themselves but the issue remains what you do with the feelings. Teens and their thought processes should be schooled. They should be tutored on what to do with such feelings when they have them. Our children should be trained to discipline such thoughts as well as exercise restrain and constraints where and when necessary. Also, they should be groomed to show a high level of discipline and self-governance. More so, one can be outgoing without being a whore. Importantly, they are to note that, there is more to gain when you stick to a partner: you not only protect yourself and self–respect, you also earn the respect of others.  Above all, there is a lot of wisdom in deciding to stick with just a partner.

Responses:

“First, I want to disagree with the use of a term that connotes that the two moves together and one causes the other. Having said that, let me go on to share my thoughts on this: Promiscuity suggests that the man or woman is behaving like a butterfly. A one that does that socially is an unstable fellow. Spiritually, based on the knowledge of the true meaning of copulation, such a one cannot be blessed. Each time he or she is with different partners, he or she experiences reduced blessings. Medically, given the fact that the genitals of both the man and woman have been identified to be the most fertile incubation for germs, every time the man ‘dips’, the man deeps self into a multiplicity of germs and the more varied the practice of “dipping” himself, the greater the chances of multiplication of germs infestation and imbalance in health.”

For me: “Promiscuity by its very definition is the abuse of an otherwise ordained activity- an indulgence in an indiscriminate sexual relationship. How can it be that abuse will conduce to a healthy or long life? It’s a contradiction in terms. Physical education experts tend to overstate their case by conjuring a convergence between physical sexual activity and physical fitness. They are correct only in d reverse! There is no correlation between an immoral act and a desire for a fit and purposeful physical body. QED!”

While “Religion says it leads to an early death. Science says otherwise. We know there is a high risk though to contact bad things. From a social point, the answer is open for debate.  It can be good, forgive my thoughts. But I think there is a safe place for it if people are well trained.”

“It’s a mystery!!! Some live healthy & long despite their promiscuous life! On the other hand, those who live a pious life don’t live long! Conclusion: Face your God!”

“Hmmm! This is a real question: The first thought is whether it gives you a long life of 200years or 20years? It is sin and wrong too. Let’s remember there is orun apaadi(hell). Now, to rational thinking. It may extend life (not healthy o but long in some ways) because of the enjoyment that may be derived from it. Excitement, happiness general is good for health. The sense of adventure and adrenaline from it can also keep the heart pumping in some ways. But… at the same end of the same rope is death. The exciting heart can over-excite and shut down. Hypertension from the worry of being caught shortens life. Sexually transmitted diseases are real even with precautions. At best you have money to manage it but it can’t still be for long. If married, the ‘eleda’ (head) of the other person can catch it if the person does not run to God. So as the person pleases”.

“From both spiritual and physical standpoints, there can only be a negative correlation between promiscuous and healthy/long life.”

 

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